The Cougar

I went to a friend's housewarming party a little ways back. Being that I had some vegetarian friends going, I took a shot at a vegetarian meatloaf. It came out amazing as it turns out, and particularly wooed the palette of a particular party-goer. She had to leave early, so we only spoke briefly, but apparently I made quite an impression on her. She contacted the host for my email address, and asked me out. Once again, how often do women ask men out? Seriously, twice in a month? Granted one of them was on a dating website where its more expected, but you have to understand I'm a bit old-fashioned, and was never really a ladies man. I think thats more times than I ever was asked out in my whole life. Maybe I'm just better looking now? Who knows.

Anyway I was not about to pass up an opportunity like this, so of course I said yes. She emailed back a bit, and I quickly took note how overly affectionate she was in her emails. Things like "hey handsome" and stuff that would be endearing had we met for more than a brief conversation about meatless meatloaf at a party. I didn't pay much attention to it, though, as I put more vest into meeting people in person. Then she bailed! We were supposed to meet on a Monday for lunch, but she never confirmed. I called the day of, no answer!

So I was bummed, but didn't take it too personally. She emailed me a few days later, guess it was just a bit of mis communication. So we rescheduled, then she canceled again. By this point I was tired of dressing up for work to just keep getting canceled on, but I gave her another re-schedule.

We finally met up for lunch at a sushi place downtown, and what a cougar! Now granted we had met, but you have to remember, it was really brief and quick. I don't think our age difference was apparent to both of us at the party, but she had to be at least 12 years older than me! I think over lunch I realized it more than she did. I look a bit older for my age, but there was an awkward moment when I mentioned "our generation". Unfortunately, I didn't find her that attractive, so I couldn't sugar-mom her up for show tickets and fancy evenings on the town. Maybe my next cougar.....

This is the kind of thing I expected to happen when dating without precondition. Not quite as dramatic as I expected, but still a good one for the books.

The Heavyweight

I got a message on a dating website asking me to go for a beer. It wasn't after a conversation or anything, just a straight up invitation to a stranger. That takes some serious balls, and I figured, how often do women ask men out? So in the spirit of no-precondition, I met up with her at a bar downtown. After viewing her profile I pretty much knew she wasn't was I was looking for, but I did it anyway. It may sounds terrible, but she was kind of a big girl and I wasn't physically attracted to her. Now I fully believe that some people become more attractive as you get to know them, but personality wise there were some clear indicators that wouldn't be the case.

But I met up with her regardless, and going in knowing it didn't mean anything made it really easy to be relaxed and enjoy myself. I think I need to just not be interested in people at all from now on. We ended up hanging out for like four hours just chatting about this and that. I still wasn't attracted to her, but her personality is similar to many people I knew in college, so getting along with her was easy for me. I do feel torn about the situation though, I kind of feel like I was leading her along. I'd like to stick her in the friend zone but that seems mean. I mean, I'm the guy who's usually really good at sticking himself in the friend zone, but never when I want to. I since haven't really spoken to her, online or not, maybe I'm a jerk.

Ketchups and The Forgotten

So I've been terrible at updating this thing, sorry. No excuses.
Anyway I'm going to make a few posts with relative updates in the single in philly world.

The Forgotten
I met up with an old friend over Thanksgiving, actually an old friend of my sisters, who has since moved away but we always had a thing for eachother. We ended up flirting a bit, things came out over drinks, etc, but I didn't pursue it at all. I'd like to think that I was being reasonable, considerate, sacrificing, and chivilrous, but maybe I was just afraid of being hurt. I can't help but wonder what I would have regretted more. Maybe I need to stop being so sincere. Perhaps it's easier to be nice than passionate. Either way I think I have a serious fear of being heartbroken again, and thats something I need to workout before I'm able to seriously date someone. Going on a stranger date isn't a big deal, we don't know eachother and its fun, but with her it would have meant something, and that was a bit scary.